Typically the first reaction I receive when I choose to tell a friend or family member that I am practicing Elimination Communication (EC) is a chuckle.  The chuckle stems from the name.  Many people don’t understand what it means.  When they do, they think it is an odd name for infant potty training.  It does sound like a hippy, new wave name for an age-old practice.  

So what exactly is Elimination Communication?  Is it like the Baby Potty Whisperer, where you connect with your child and will him/her to pee on the potty?  Surprisingly, it is like that.  EC relies on the communication between parent/ caregiver and child.  Babies are born with an awareness of their eliminations.  They instinctively do not want to pee or poop on themselves or sit in a dirty diaper.  The goal of EC is not to have a “potty trained” infant.  To many Westerners, “potty training” is when a child can independently take care of their needs.  They are able to recognize when they need to go, get themselves to the potty, remove their own underwear, and clean up after themselves.  With EC, you are not going to get a six-month-old child to do this; it is physically impossible.  You could sit a six month old on a potty or toilet insert and catch their pee or poop.  Eventually, you may have a toddler who walks over to the toilet when they feel the need to “go.”  Some parents get so good at EC that their children go diaperless most of the time with very few “misses.”

Being a potty whisperer means choosing a cue noise or sound.  I say “pssst” to cue a pee.  I have yet to cue poops since he will not sit on a potty yet.  Many parents make a grunting noise for this purpose.  In addition to saying “psst” I tickle his lower back.  This combination has been very effective for me.  My son is very deceptive about cueing me.  For now, I rely on timing and common sense.  I have noticed lately that he opens his mouth while he pees.  This won’t help me get him to the potty to catch it, but if I notice it while he is in a diaper I know to check and see if he is wet.  He is even more deceptive about his bowel movements.  He is a secret pooper!  He has pooped standing directly in front of me, and the only way I knew he pooped was by feeling it on my foot!  He is also irregular still.  I am hoping that once he gets on more solids he will begin pooping at regular times.  This may be my only hope to catch a poo.

If you are so inclined, you can begin ECing as soon as the baby is born.  I have read stories where new mother’s caught their baby’s meconium in a bowl soon after birth.  There is no timetable or rule saying you must begin at birth, or that you can’t begin when a child is toddling.  The most wonderful thing about EC is that it is exactly what you want it to be.  You can practice it is exclusively, and attempt to catch every elimination in a sink, bathtub, toilet, potty, or even a diaper.  You can practice only at home where it is convenient.  You can only EC when it is possible for you, which may only be once a day or even once a week.

I began ECing when my son was around 6 months old.  I began slowly, letting him go diaperless during playtime and trying to understand his schedule and see if he had any cues.  We had quite a few misses, but each miss provided an opportunity to understand how, when, and why he went to the bathroom.  On one occasion, I picked my son up off the floor and was about to put him to bed.  I bent him down to give his daddy a kiss goodnight, and he began to pee just as I was coming back up!  I turned him away and most of the pee went onto the blanket on the floor.  My husband was mortified!  He was very near getting peed on.  I laid him back on the floor so I could get things cleaned up.  I felt safe in this since he has just gone.  Not even five minutes later he went straight up into the air!!!

Eventually I broke down and got the Baby Bjorn Little Potty.  The first day I got it home I was gung ho!  I decided my son wouldn’t wear a diaper at all.  I had just read The Diaper Free Baby by Christina Gross-Loh.   I learned so much from her book.  My son had other plans than using a potty that day.  He did not want to bend his knees to actually sit on a potty.  That day, he pooped right in front of the potty since he would not sit.  I call that a big miss!

The next day I relied on timing to catch my son’s urinations.  In the book, it said that most babies pee right after they wake up in the morning, after naps, and after nursing.  I followed each of those guidelines.  I caught my first pee in the potty as soon as he woke up in the morning.  After he nursed, we tried again, with another pee caught.  After his first nap, I took him to the potty and stood him in front of it.  He will not sit on it, so we use it as a urinal.  He peed again!  My first day I caught seven pees with four misses. The misses were all caught in a diaper.  After a few times of standing him in front of his potty and making the “pssst” sound, he even started to understand that I was cueing him to pee.  I noticed on many occasions, he would contract his stomach muscles, forcing a pee out!

The one thing I want everyone to understand about EC is this:  it is not a forceful activity.  I do not take my son to a potty, kicking and screaming, and force him to sit on it until he uses the bathroom, however long that may be.  ECing for me is a relaxed affair.  I choose the times I practice it.  If we are having a busy day, I may only catch his first morning pee, or a pee after his nap.  I stand him in front of his potty and cue him.  If he hasn’t gone within a minute or two, we put his diaper on and go about our day.  We still have wet diapers during the day.  Some days I use fewer diapers than others.  To me, EC means helping my child be more comfortable.  The bonus is that by using fewer diapers, I wash less, and this means less energy (mommy energy and electricity) and water wasted.

To anyone out there thinking this is crazy, consider taking your child to the potty just once after they wake up.  They may go or they may not.  But I bet if they do you will feel the excitement of using one less diaper!  And it keeps growing from there.

Thanks Kimberly, we appreciate you sharing a little more about practicing EC and what that has meant for your family!

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